They have all kinds of signs out there telling people not to hit women, people still do it. Right? So what are you telling me? Somebody… you’re telling me someone who never hit a woman is gonna come walking in, read that joke, you know, just be, “Wait a minute!” That’s the dumbest shit. You ever see how they fall? They fall like toddlers, you know? It’s like they never fell in their life. Yeah! I don’t understand, like, what do they think is gonna happen if somebody reads that joke? Like, you’re some guy who would never hit a woman, ya know. All of a sudden, people start complaining. That’s what we’re doing.” She takes a picture of it, puts it on Facebook. He’s just like, “That’s our sense of humor here. One person comes in, they don’t like it, they ask the manager to take it down. That’s a great fucking joke! There is zero fat on that. She goes, “We like our beer the way we like our violence, domestic.” Right? Now I got to tell you something. I was doing a gig in Dallas, and some waitress wrote on a piece of chalkboard. Everybody getting in trouble, like a bunch of children.
But other than that, yeah, go fuck yourself. People apologizing to ’em like they have some sort of power. Yeah! With birthday cake in his mouth and a Santa Claus hat on his head, just to ruin the entire year. Gonna try to do my best, it’s a great organization, and the same shit the last 80 guys said. How does it feel?” “Well, you know, it’s a blessing. “Yeah, you’re a member of the Buffalo Bills.
Fucking got to sit there and watch that shit. They’re gonna have the whole list the next day. They need to improve their defensive line.” Dude, that’s like going to a graduation ceremony where you don’t know anybody who’s graduating. It’s like, dude, that’s what you get for watching the draft, all right? Now once again, what kind of a fucking loser just sits there watching round after round? “The Jets are up next. Everybody bitch, moaning and complaining. What kind of a fucking loser, right? That’s the same way I look at people who got upset about, you know, Michael Sam, the gay football player kissing his boyfriend when he got drafted. Right? Who the fuck joins a group? “I’m gonna join a group, that’s what I’m gonna do today.” Go to meetings. What about that? What do you got, two million people in your group? There’s 400 million in this country. I didn’t mean to say that it’s an ugly-ass dog, nah.” Right? Fuck you and your group. “We’re part of a group, eh.” You gotta apologize. Everybody getting in trouble, all these goddamn groups out there, bitch, moaning and complaining anytime anybody says anything. You got to be fuckin’ nice, especially this day and age. Under your seats is a multiple choice questionnaire! If you did not bring a pencil, you’re already out!” You can’t do that. Coming out there: “And if elected, I would implement a program to immediately eliminate at least 85% of you! This planet cannot sustain the sheer numbers– Let me finish! This will not be arbitrary. You can’t run with that as your platform. Waiting… for some politician to have the balls to bring it up, but they won’t do it, they won’t do it. – I have been bitching about the population problem for three specials in a row. Nobody has the balls to come out and just say, “Look, 85% of you have to go.” – That’s it! That is it. You know, “If everybody went vegan, the air would be– If everybody drove an electric car, if everybody just had some snowshoes on.” Right? They just won’t come out and say it. I guess there’s all this cattle standing around, and when they fart, the gas goes up in the atmosphere and causes something. One of those “V” ones, right? They said it’ll be great for the environment, you know. They said if everybody went vegan, if everybody went vegan or vegetarian, whatever the hell they said.
Something’s got to get its beak chopped off, its feathers yanked, uppercut to its jaw, just in order for me to survive. Five o’clock, that’s what I realized about myself, you know that? Something has to die every day in order for me to live. But I hate going to the gym, so I decided I’d go veggie twice a week. How would you get along with anybody? “Look at ’em just over there, drinkin’ a cold drink! Lemonade was made for the white man!” So… What the hell have I been doing with my life? Trying to get in shape, man. That kind of heat, you understand the racism down here, ya know? I get it. It’s a pleasure to be here in the greater Atlanta, Georgia, area, this oasis. All right, thank you! Thank you very much! Thank you.
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